


Shattered Glass

by Ikal (orphan_account)



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: "kind to strangers" Canada cause I dont see much of him, AmeCan, Caname - Freeform, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Self-Harm, Technically Incest?, There will be more characters but these are the main, USCan, slight FrUK - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-01
Updated: 2017-10-01
Packaged: 2019-01-07 15:00:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,632
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12235239
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/Ikal
Summary: America has a secret. One he doesnt want anyone to find out. But due to the fear of his secret, he now has another one. But, if someone did find out, would everything break like glass? Fragile glass?Im gonna finish this story, just wrap it up then orphan it. Im just not proud of it. So sorry.~Ikal





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> You dont know how annoyed I am.. I wrote almost half of the chapter and it all deleted. It was probably better the first time around. Well enjoy.
> 
> {After chapter was written}  
> ...I wrote the part with the shooting the night before an actual shooting... O.o  
> I PREDICTED THE FUUUUUTURE!  
> Why use this power for good when you can use it for bad? :>

America always smiled. He smiled behind a mask. A mask created by his own visions. A mask he wished was really him. But what reason did he have? He was a country. Things hardly ever worked out for them. Scratch that. They never did.

He was sitting in his chair at the meeting hall, engrossed in his daydreams, when he felt something jab him in the ribs. He looked over to England, clearly annoyed when he felt all eyes on him. He sat up in his chair and looked around him. No one said a word but they were all clearly waiting.

"It is your turn!" England whispered and glared at him. He then added, "Pay more attention you git..." when he thought America couldnt hear him. But he could. He could loud and clear. He didnt complain though and instead stood up, preparing to present. He started talking and pacing side to side, rather nervously. He seemed different. And someone noticed. His northern neighbour, Canada realized that, even though no one else noticed, America was accually speaking quieter than usual. But before anything much could be thought, let alone said, they came across a bit of a problem. America had kinda-sorta tripped over his own foot and he fell. His face collided with the side of Canada's chair and everyone in the room stopped for a second. Then, a second later, all that could be heard was the loud laughter from the nations. America could even hear some sighing in disappointment. (Im looking at you England =_=) He was rubbing his jaw in pain as Canada looked down at him, slightly horrified at what had happened. Then America looked up at him, their eyes locking. Both were completely silent until Canada spoke up.

"Are you okay?" He realized how foolish it was to ask as soon as the words left his mouth. But he was left surprised.

"Yeah. Thanks Canada." America had replied. Wait. He remembered his name? Who was this person? Canada's mouth dropped slightly, in awe. How did he remember his name? What was going on? But before he could ask, America stood up and announced his departure. He quickly gathered his papers and rushed out before anyone could say a thing. Canada pushed out and stood up, looking at the door. He had accidentally pushed Kumajirou out of his lap in the process as well. He felt all eyes on him but he really didnt care. He ran after his brother even though everyone was pelting him with the same question over and over again.

"Who are you?" They all asked. Except for France, who was just wondering when he got there. (Hes been there you bloody git...) He didnt answer and ran.

He didnt have to go far to find his brother. He had to be at the hotel that was a few blocks down. He had to be. Right now, he really regretted not taking a car to the meeting hall. He ran and ran, not stopping to take any breaks at all. However as soon as Canada got there, he noticed a bit of a problem. There were insanely long lines for the elevators. He groaned and ran to the stairs swinging the door open. He cheered inside his head as he saw only a couple there. One girl was limping and, thanks to her pant leg being rolled up, Canada realized her leg was covered in blood. The girl had short, black hair. She was wearing a red T-shirt with a black, unzipped hoodie and dark jeans. She also had many scraches and burns. Her girlfriend was helping her up the stairs and Canada walked up to them. They assumed he only wanted to pass them, so they slid to the side. However, they were wrong.

"May I help you?" He asked. The bloody girl opened her mouth to respond but shut it shortly after. Then she just nodded. Canada slipped his arm under hers and around her back as all three started up the stairs.

"What floor are you two on?" He asked.

"Second to top one. Convenient isn't it?" The other girl spoke up with a slight laugh. She was a very light blonde haired girl with light blue highlights in her hair. She wore a denim jacket with a grey scaft wrapped around her neck and jeans as well. She must have been from Norway due to her thick accent.

"My floor is the next one and I can get her fixed up if you trust me." He looked over to the blonde and smiled.

"Next floor? But that one's reserved." She said, clearly confused.

"Yes I know. And its due to the nations meetings."

"You dont mean to tell me you ARE one of the nations?"

"Yeah. I am. But do you trust me? Enough to get fixed up?" Before anyone could say a thing, the bloody girl nodded her head vigorously. The other two laughed and continued walking until the got to the next floor. They opened the door and walked out into the dimly lit halls.

"Spooky." The blonde laughed. Canada laughed along and they walked down the halls until they got to his room. He fumbled with his keycard and unlocked the door.

He gestured to the bathroom and said, "Here wash her leg off. I'll grab a gauze." Both women went into the bathroom and a few seconds later, the calm sound of water running was heard. Canada opened one of his bags and looked until he found a gauze and some ointment. Hey you never know. He couldve needed them. He grabbed them and walked into the bathroom. The brunette was sitting on the tub, wincing as her girlfriend was washing off her leg. Then they turned off the tub and dried off her leg as Canada grabbed some paper towels and put ointment on it. He helped the blonde rub it on the others leg as he struck up conversation.

"What had happened that made her leg so bad that you would trust a complete stranger?" Canada laughed and the blonde smiled.

"There was a shooting down a few blocks at the shopping centre. Cæcilie here was caught up in it. She called me and we came back here. They dont know who did it but I hope they catch them! You dont hurt my love and get away with it!" In spite of her pain, Cæcilie laughed. They started wrapping up her leg in the gauze and when they finished, they all stood up and walked out of the room.

"Thanks." The blonde said. She extended her hand for Canada to shake and he took it. "The name's Viola." She smiled.

"Matthew. But Im better known as the personification of Canada." He returned her warm smile. Cæcilie grabbed her girlfriends other hand and tried walking away. Viola let go of Canadas hand and followed her. She waved back at him and then started helping Cæcilie, who was still limping but walking considerably better. He smiled and watched them go until they had left his sights. They were sweet. He stood there feeling stupid and unsure about why he had even come to the hotel in the first place. Then he remembered. His brother! Canada ran down the hall until he reached the Americans room. He searched through his pockets until he found the spare key to his room. He unlocked the door and threw it open. Running to the bed, he saw America laying on his stomach, face burried in his pillow. He let out a sigh of relief and he didnt know why. The Canadian walked over to the side of his bed and knelt down by his head.

"America?" No response. "Come on. I know you can hear me. Well...now I do." He only got a groan in response but it was something at least. Canada smiled and then added, "Your going to suffocate like that." He laughed. But Americas response was not a joke.

"Good! I hope I do." His voice was muffled and strained. Canadas smile fell as he rest his hand on his brothers back. The American flinched but then relaxed. Canada could feel his back rise and fall in breathing. But it started slowing. Worried he said, "America. Please, get up." He saw him slightly shake his head in silence.

"Get up." He commanded him. Again he shook his head. His breathing slowed further. By now, Canada was not having it. He started shaking him, "Get! Up! Now!" When he didnt get a response he pushed his brothers side, rolling him over. Americas eyes were shut but Canada noticed he was breathing again. They were shallow breaths.

"Why? Whats going on?" Canada asked, knowing he was heard.

"Because I dont want to deal with this. I want to protect you. And everyone else too!"

"What do you mean?" He was starting to get worried.

America sat up and pointed behind his brother saying, "Thats why." Canada turned around and say on the wall a big shadow-like creature on the wall. It looked almost like a person...if the person was extremely deformed.

"What...what the..." Canada was confused. What was that?

"Look around you. These things follow me around and no one sees them because they dont pay attention to them. Almost like you." He burried his face in his knees as Canada looked around at the creatures. Some were big, some small. Some took shape, others not so much. Either way, they scared the Hell out of America.

"What do they do?" Canada looked back to the terrified American.

"Some kill. They kill humans and animals alike. Some stalk and drive you into madness. Others whisper for you too kill yourself. But worst of all, is when you can see them all the time. In about an hour, you shouldnt be able to see them anymore. Me? Ill forget them when I wake up and yet, boom. There they are. They wont leave."

He felt bad for asking this, but Canada did it anyway, "What happens if you can see them?"

"They harm or torture whoever I'm close to. And I dont want them to. I cant do anything about it. But it only ever happens when my gaurd is down. So I try."

"Why dont you tell the others?"

America sat up, "They already nitpick at everything I do! Everything I say! What I eat! How I act! I piss them off any chance I get! They wont believe me! They never will! I try so hard to please them! I try to act professional! I forget to eat! Hell I've even tried copying things they do! But it wont work!"

Canada jumped back. America hardly ever snapped at anyone. Then again, Canada hardly yelled at anyone. America noticed and hung his head low. 

"Sorry for snapping at you. Its not your fault." Canada looked at him and was all of a sudden mesmerized. He looked so weak, so helpless. Almost as if he could easily be forced into submission... Wait! What the Hell was he thinking!? He wouldnt- No! Right? Before any more dirty thoughts could cross his mind, America fell back onto the bed, running his hand through his golden hair.

"...Hey Alfred?" Canada hardly used his human name. He was always 'America' to him.

"Hm?"

"What do you mean by...'I forget to eat'?" America froze. He did say that didnt he.

"Heh. Is that what I said? Thats not what I meant. Trust me." He wouldnt dare look at him.

"I do trust you. I also trust that you are lying." Then he added in a stern voice, "Now tell me wont you? What that meant?"

"It meant nothing. Really."

"Tell me." By now he had gotten on the bed, crawling closer.

"Nothing."

Finally, Canada was practically on top of his southern neighbour. He leaned in close as he whispered, "You are going to tell me know or I'll force it out of you."

Even slightly terrified, America stayed brave, "How?" He almost growled.

Canada smirked, "Oh youll see."

By now, America was done. "Fine! I said that because...I stopped eating for a long time. And any time Im around countries, Im eating something because its the only chance I get to eat." Silence.

"Get up."

"Why?"

"Were going out."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it took too long to update the story!

It took some time (You mean a lot?) but Canada evenually got America out of bed and into his car. He started the engines but then remembered, he had no clue where to go.

"Where do you want to eat?" Canada asked his brother, who was slightly pouting in the passengers seat.

"I dunno. We're in Norway...how should I know?" Canada playfully slapped him in the arm.

"Fine. Lets drive around." They did too. They were probably driving for at least 20 minutes until the settled with a restaurant called Arakataka. (ODDLY ENOUGH THEY COULD GET IN WITHOUT RESERVATIONS. THEY ARE NATIONS AFTER ALL!) After settling in, Canada noticed something right behind America. A few metres away, he saw light blonde hair. By that was black hair. Cæcilie looked up and saw him so she waved. Then Viola turned and waved as well. Canada waved back to the two of them and America was confused as all Hell.

"Who are they?" He asked.

"Thats Viola and Cæcilie. Earlier today Cæcilie was caught up in a shooting and I kind of helped her and Viola out."

"Oh." He didnt have much to say and neither did Canada. They sat awkwardly even after they had gotten their food. Canada noticed America wasnt eating much and he glared at him

"I didnt drive you all the way down here for you to not eat. You are going to eat something even if I have to forcefully shove it down your throat." America stared at him and then decided it was best if he ate something. So he stopped picking with his food and ate it. It was actually pretty good! Both continued eating in silence for the rest of the meal and by the time they had finished and were getting in the car, they were torn by the silence.

"Now where to?" America asked, feeling rather guilty.

"Not sure."

"Canada?"

"Hm?"

"Why are you doing this? All these years, I had hurt you. I faked forgetting your birthday, forgetting you. I acted like you didnt exist, when, I knew you were there. I could see you, hear you. And yet I...I never did anything about it. I never even tried to tell the others you were there. So why? Why do you care?" Canada turned to face him. America looked confused, yet terrified of the answer he expected.

"Because youre important to me. Way more than you actually think."

"But why? I've done nothing. I piss everyone off. I cant do anything right. And all I want is...Is someone to understand. Understand that Im trying. Trying as hard as I can."

Canada put a finger up to his lips and silenced him. He started pulling away from the lot as he whispered, "Yes I get it. And you dont have to try so hard. Okay?"

The other just nodded in response as he turned to face the window. After a few moments he realized they were heading back to the meeting hall. He turned to look at his brother and said, "Hey. Why are we..?"

"The meeting isnt completely over and I bet we can sneak in practically undetected. I do that every day. No one ever notices me." The Canadian growled then quickly added, "Well except for you."

"Okay. We can try to." America was still being unusually quiet as they pulled into the parking lot. They both climbed out of the car and walked into the huge, milky white building. However as soon as they got over to the conference room, they realized everything was quiet. Canada slightly opened the door to see no one but Germany and Italy were there. They were stuck in deep conversation, not noticing the other two nations walk in. As soon as they heard footsteps, Germany and Italy turned around to stare at them, but only seeing America.

"Hey. Look I'm sorry for leaving in the middle of the meeting..."Americas voice drifted off as his eyes wandered to the back wall. He jumped up and the other two were very confused. America snapped his attention back to them, muttering, "Sorry." He seemed really terrified.

Canada walked up to his side and asked, "America? Whats..." He stopped. He knew exactly what was wrong. Even though he couldnt see them, he knew the shadows were there. But Germany and Italy looked at them, confused as Canada said, "America, calm down. Youre fine. They wont wont hurt you." He put his hand on the others shoulders, noticing how tense he was. Canada smiled as he felt him relax under his touch. Germany and Italy looked at each other, clearly worried.

"D-dont worry guys..! We arent talking about you." America slightly laughed. His laugh faded and he looked away, afraid to face them. He all of a sudden felt tired. He yawned but when he tried to open his eyes again, he found out that he couldnt. Then, he heard the yells of his friends as he fell to the cold, hard floor. Then, their yells died out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this one was so short. I wanted to end it there because I want the next part in the next chapter. Sorry! Ill try to hurry and make the next one. long too. Thanks for reading!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Self-harm so if that bothers you in any way, you should probably stop reading this fic.

America opened his eyes and looked around the room. Everything was grey, almost like a void, but lighter. There werent any clear, defined walls, ceiling, or floor. Everything was empty. Until the shadows came. Some appeared but not as many as he usually saw. But before he could do anything, they spoke.

"America. The Nation of America. A nation that isnt needed. Isnt wanted. End your life and no one will notice. The sun will still rise in the morning. Rockets will still go off. So why not? No one cares anyways." All spoke in creepy, hollow, unison. America opened his mouth to deny them, but no words came out. He thought of their words as they gradually got closer to him, starting to believe what they said. No one would care. Everyone would cheer. They wouldnt have to deal with him. They'd be...happy. The shadows kept getting closer as he walked back from them. America covered his ears, scared of what the shadows would do to him. But before anything could happen, he awoke to shaking and yelling. Canada was shaking him vigorously, tears rolling down his face. No one realized he was up yet.

"God please help us. Get up America. Alfred. Please." The Canadian was whispering.

America groaned as he stretched and sat up. He was about to ask him something but before any words could form, Canada tackled him into a hug. Germany and Italy tried to pry him off of the other one as they helped him up.

"What happened?" The American asked.

"You passed out. Youve been out for three hours." Germany answered him.

"What? Whyd you stay?"

Before he could answer, Canada spoke up, "Because we care for you. Really."

"Dont."

"What?"

"Dont care. Please. Theyre going to kill you all. The shadows wont stop until everyone of you drops dead."

"And I should care why?"

"Because I dont want you dead!" Silence. All four men stood there waiting, waiting for something. Americas breaths became unsteady and he covered his mouth, walking off, towards the entrance of the building. The other three started after him and headed to their cars. Canada got in his own and America was sitting shotgun. The entire car ride was sheltered in silence. When they got to the hotel, it was a lot louder than it used to be. First thing they heard when they walked in was a familiar voice.

"Where were you? Why did you just leave the meeting." England asked.

"Can it, Iggy." America grabbed Canadas hand and pushed past him, walking to the elevator. They got in and traveled up to their floor, the entire ride as silent as the car, with the exception of Canadas coughing. They got out and they walked into Americas room, hands still unknowingly intertwined. America let go of him as soon as the door was shut and he layed down in his bed and rolled over to face the wall.

"Whats going on? Youre acting weird." Canada said. America then stood up and covered his mouth again. He ran to the bathroom and slammed the door shut, locking it. Canada ran over to it and asked, "America? Please. Come out." When there came no response, he began to get worried. But when he heard crying and a muffled scream, thats when he started thinking rash. He slammed his body into the door, hoping to break it down. He tried at least three times but the door didnt budge.

"Alfred! Let me in!" Canada used his human name to show that he was serious. He only heard the crying get louder and another muffled scream. He backed up and ran into the door, in attempts to kick it down. The hinges snapped and the door swung open, revealing the American. He was covered in blood, both dried and fresh. His wrists and and ankles were clearly slit but Canada suspected his neck was slightly cut as well. He had a hand towel in his mouth, probably what had muffled the screams. Canada rushed over to his side and looked around confused on what to do. He then pulled the towel out of his brothers mouth so he could breathe. His cries were sharp and painful to hear. Hardly anyone ever heard them. He never cried. Not that anyone could see. But in reality, he cried more than theyd ever think. And he was crying now.

"Oh god. Oh God oh God." Canada trembled as he grabbed another towel and held it under rushing water. He placed the towel over Americas wrists then moved to his ankles. The white towel turned bright red as it soaked up the blood. Canada looked at the other and came up with an idea. His voice was shaking when he said, "Im...Im going to get you help. Okay?" America shook his head. He didnt want help. But he knew his brother was going to get him help anyways. Canada ran out into the hallway to see if anyone was there. When he didnt see anyone, he ran inside and replaced the towel on Americas wrists, telling him, "Stay here and keep this covering the wounds. Ill be right back." Then he ran out of the room and down the hall to the stairs. He flung open the door and ran down the stairs, skipping some. When he reached the ground floor, he looked around to see if England was still there. Sure enough he was. He was over bickering with France. Of course. Canada ran over to them, completely out of breath. He tried explaining what had happened to them, but had a hard time doing it.

"Um...excuse me but, do we know you?" England asked him.

France elbowed him in the side and said, "This is Mathieu or Canada." He then turned to face the younger nation, "What is it?"

"I-its...Am-Ameri...ca..." Canada was completely out of breath.

"What about America..!?"England asked.

"Hes...hes...Just follow m-me..!" He took off at a sprint, even though he had no breath left. Both men took off after him and they all sprinted up the stairs. Once they got to the room, Canada swung the door open and led the couple to the bathroom. They rushed in and noticed America, still covered in blood, was laying on the floor, almost passed out. He was barely clinging onto consciousness. The older two gasped in horror. Then Canada spoke up, "Keep him awake. I dont know how just...you can manage. I'll call 113." Canada quickly grabbed the phone and punched in the digits. The phone rang until he was able to get ahold of someone. While he did that, France and England picked up America and layed him on his bed. He started mumbling something but couldnt speak very loud so no one understood what he was saying. England and France started bickering over who knows what and America tried telling them to stop but couldnt get loud enough.

As soon as he hung up the phone, Canada told them, "They should arrive soon." He then looked at his brother and started crying. France and England stopped bickering long enough to notice him. He collapsed next to his brother and cried. America smiled sadly and tried to move hair out of his brothers face. That only made the Canadian cry louder.

"Im sorry. Really I am. But please dont cry. Its as bad as what the shadows would do. So please. Dont cry. For me." America muttered, only loud enough for Canada to hear him. Canada tried to stop crying, but the salted crystals kept forming and falling. And they waited. They just waited.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 113 is the Norwegian emergency number for an Ambulance. I didnt put an actual conversation because Im not 100% sure I know how it goes. If they had one number for everything then Id put a conversation.


	4. Chapter 4

When the ambulance eventually came, Canada hadnt stopped his crying. They loaded America onto the stretcher and into the ambulance as a nurse started asking the other three questions.

"When did this happen?" He had asked.

"A little before we called 113." England answered knowing Canada wasnt well enough to. The nurse nodded and wrote it down.

"How about why?"

"We arent sure." France said to him.

"Actually...I have an idea..,"Canada spoke through tears, "But you wont believe me."

"We need any info we can."

"Okay. Well, he has been seeing these shadows that follow him around. And based on what theyve done in the past...He was worried they would kill us. I know he isnt going crazy because when he told me to look at them, they were there. However an hour later, they were gone. But only for me. I can only suspect thats whats been happening." Canada had no more tears to cry as they were all staining his face. He knew the others wouldnt believe him, but hed try anyway. Everything went silent. No one talked. They stood in the silence, waiting until the nurse looked over at the ambulance and spoke up.

"Would any of you like to ride with?" He asked. France looked over to the other two and nodded to them, hinting they should, not him.

Canada looked away and told them, "Im not sure I could even bare to..."

England placed his hand on the youngers shoulder, "It okay if you dont. Im sure hed understand." Canada nodded but stood up. He followed the nurse anyways. England shrugged and followed along, leaving France to head to his own car. They all knew it was gonna be a long night.

(Hours later, after being rushed in the hospital.)

The trio had been waiting in the waiting room for quite some time before a different nurse had walked out to them and ushered them into their friends room. He was sleeping peacefully in the bed, dispite being bandaged up. Canada walked over to the edge of it and grabbed his hand, sadly. He made an attempt to muffle his tears and crying but they were heard anyway. He bent down and placed his lips, salted by the tears, on Americas cold ones. But not long after he felt himself being kissed back. He smiled. Now how were they going to explain this to the others. France and England would already know so, theyd be easy to explain. Said countrys smirked and walked out of the room.

"You know, I wondered how long it would be. I didnt expect it to happen like this though."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ill let you decide who said the last line. Also I didnt put the girls in this more cause I wanted to quickly wrap it up. Well bye!

**Author's Note:**

> Cæcilie and Viola will end up important in this. Dont worry. I had a reason.
> 
> Also with the suffocating. I know. Countries cant die from means like suffocation but they SURE AS HELL CAN FEEL IT! AND IT SUCKS!


End file.
